"I don’t wanna live where weakness is a strength and pain is a compromise to live this life" --Me.
Do you believe in Fairy Tales??
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“Why am I alone? Am I not good enough?”
Sadly, I’ve heard this TOO many times. If you’re asking yourself any of these questions. The answer could very easily be, no, you’re not good enough. But wait, before the guards go up , I’m speaking in the sense that maybe you have not prepared yourself for an actual relationship and just what that means. Many times you can become caught up in the IDEA of a relationship and not really even consider what may come with the actual relationship. As women, we have been programmed to search for our soulmate, constantly want to be with someone, feel loved, etc etc. However in order to not have your heart trampled on, you have to realize once and for all, that fairy tales were only good when we were kids. The real deal is that most men are not Prince Charming and most relationships are not going to end HappilyEverAfter! When wondering if you are ready for a relationship, ask yourself: Am I ready to give up who I am for a guy? Ready to be naïve? Ready to be made to feel inferior? Am I ready for all the negative that comes with the single positive of “I feel good because I’m with someone”, even if that person is scum of the Earth. Are you ready for what I like to call, the vicious circle that comes with immature guys and sub-par relationships, meaning the continuous bad with a little good thrown in there to keep you around, or the simple cycle of dating with no progression.
Don’t get me wrong I am in NO way speaking on all relationships and these are MY personal beliefs. I have an older sister who is engaged to an awesome, God-fearing man and I truly believe their relationship is blessed and will genuinely work out. However, in my eyes, there is about a 5% chance that the rest of us will find this.
Call me cynical or pessimistic if you want. But sit back an actually think about what I’m saying and you’ll see that there is plenty of truth and validity to my claims. A lot of my close friends are guys and simply through spending time with them, I continue to lose hope daily (lol). But seriously, although I love them to death, they show me that guys just aren’t ready to be men and the way their minds operate are not conducive to what most women seek and need in a relationship, which isn’t helped by the fact that most women are silly and needy—but that’s a topic for another post.
Sometimes I ask myself these questions and I seek daily to answer them:
- What if there really ISNT someone for everyone. What if some of us are just destined to be alone, no matter how beautiful, smart, or great of a person we are?
- Just because the concept of Soulmates exists, does that mean we are destined to find ours, or is it just lucky for us if we just-so happen to do so?
Personally, I’m not ready for all the work a relationship takes and the thought of commitment doesn’t sit well with me. I can simply wake up in the morning and not want to be with a person anymore, it’s happened before and I still feel the pain of unnecessarily hurting people in my past relationships. What is it within me that makes that happen, I don’t know. Often times, I adopt a pre-emptive mindset, where I will either make it impossible for you to hurt me, by kicking you out of my life, or I will hurt you first.
Im beginning to ramble. More to come later.
Live Life.
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1 comments:
I have been waiting all day to comment on this post! You aren't any different than I am and I am no better than you are. What God did for me he will do the same thing for you. You know how it was for us in the beginning. We didn't bring ourselves together God brought us together. He blessed me when I wasn't even looking for the blessing to be honest I was running from the blessing. And he did it anyway. You know the bible so you know he is not a respecter of persons you just have to trust HIM. I'm just saying you know you reap what you sow. So if you never believe in love or never believe that you will find it even if He tries to bless you with it your heart won't be willing to accept it. If you are sowing negativity and being a pessimist thats what you are going to attract is negativity and thats not God. On to another note. The reason you find yourself falling out of love is because love is not an emotion...it's a choice! You have to choose to love a person. When you are head over heels for a person that is the infactuation stage and that always fades away. Then love kicks in! But you are right to be skeptical of who you give your heart to because everyone is not deserving of it but there is someone out there for you and I can't wait to see you fall flat on your face in love!!! Just needed to say that. And all that information I can back up with books I should have cited where I got the info from but just so you know I didn't make it up by myself lol! Love ya! Only your sister can come on your blog spot and critque your writing....its all in love! And I choose to love you because trust me I don't always like you :)
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